The Prophet, sal Allahu Alayhi wa salam , said ""A believer is a mirror to another believer" (narrated by Abu Huraira—transmitted in Abu Dawud). Now WHY did He say this? Why choose mirror specifically and not just say "they give naseeha (advice) to one another?
When a mirror shows you something you appreciate it
Let's say you are getting ready to go out to an important event and you are wearing black on black. You stand in front of the mirror and you find a big white feather in your hair (in your hijab for sisters ). Do you get angry at the mirror for showing you the flaw? No you appreciate it showing you the flaw because that is what you expect.
The mirror shows you your true self immediately
It doesn't stop and not show you your flaw because you are feeling good at the moment and decides to tell you when you get home so your feelings are not hurt
The mirror shows you the truth
No exaggerations. It doesn't show you that you are worse than you actually are NOR better than you actually are.
You wholeheartedly believe the mirror
You don't think "that's not me" or "the mirror doesn't know what its talking about"
The mirror shows you the good and the bad
It doesn't just show you the bad. That's why when you give advice to someone you start with something nice.
The mirror shows you what you look like in the context of what you are around
It doesn't just show you yourself and ignore everything around you.
The mirror doesn't wait for you to ask it's advice
Some people you have to pull the advice out of them
This doesn't, however, mean you call out a brother whenever you feel like it..rather you pull them aside and give them the advice or do it publicly without mentioning names. Ubay ibn fayyadh said "the believer conceals and gives advice while the hypocrite exposes and humiliates".
The mirror is always there for you
Without exception. The mirror never says "sorry, im not in the mood come look at me later."
You like coming back to the mirror
You should like to return to the people who give advice to you
The mirror will show you what is good. It won't hit you or beat you. It won't force you to change rather leave the choice to you.
Now I pose the question, Brother and Sisters: What kind of mirrors do you surround yourself with? What type of mirror are you?
By Shaffni Mohamed